Our hearts are connected by a string that's getting thinner
by jnicweb
Summary: But as long as you keep yourself together, maybe you can mend the string that binds your hearts together. Because it's scary how thin that string is getting.


**This is my first time writing for this fandom...I hope it doesn't suck.**

Falling in love is easy. It's staying in love that's hard.

You fall in love with her hair that flows so perfectly down her back. Sometimes wavy, sometimes straight, but those adjectives don't truly capture the sight of seeing it swoosh when she walks. Although lately it's been short and doesn't quite have the same effect. You can't tell if you're happy about the change.

You fall in love with her eyes that seem to stare right into your deepest secrets. Not that you've ever kept anything from her, but if you did, she would see right through you. But lately she's been ignoring the pointed looks you throw her that tell her "I love you."

You fall in love with her mouth that always seems to quirk up at the sight of you. But she's started looking away from you, and you miss that little smirk that always played around her mouth.

You fall in love with her hands, which always seem to be moving. Whether during an experiment, or gesturing when she talks, it doesn't matter. You are mesmerized by their movement, and wish she would place them on you instead of caressing the air.

You fall in love with her voice, which is somehow more musical than any instrument you've ever heard. It doesn't matter that she can't carry a tune to save her life or even hum something that is recognizable. When she says your name, you can hear how much she treasures it in her mouth, and how easily it flows off her tongue. You like to believe it's because she says your name so often, but you wonder if maybe it's because your name has a home inside her mouth, and you are not quite sure you're disappointed it's there.

You fall in love with her lips, which are always smiling and talking. And you can't quite control yourself when she pouts. Even though lately she's been frowning and you can't tell if it's because of you, or something you can't control. You can't tell which would be worse.

You fall in love with the way she tilts her head when she's confused. It's adorable and distracting, the way her head cocks to the side as if that side of her brain will work faster if it's closer to the ground. And if you purposefully confuse her just to see her tilt her head, well…it's her own fault for being so damn adorable.

You fall in love with her determination and the way she won't give up until the job is finished. Even at the academy she would never leave a job half-done, and here on the bus she is even more determined not to let anyone down, especially yourself. Even if it will never happen, she seems firm in her mission to prove herself to you. As if she has anything to prove. But recently she's been leaving the lab mid-working session. You think it's because she's tired, but you don't know if she's tired of the work, or you. Neither are preferable.

You fall in love with her stubbornness, even if it has gotten you into some fights. Once she sets her mind on something, there is nothing you can do to change it. Sometimes it's admirable, but most times it's frustrating and exhausting to try to fight with her on something she'll never compromise on. But you love it anyways.

You fall in love with her intelligence and the way she is always one step ahead of everyone, even yourself. The way her mind works is awe-inspiring and terrifying, and you wouldn't have it any other way. But lately she has started to be hard to read, and the way her mind works now is just confusing and saddening. You can't figure out where your friend has gone, and the scariest thing is that you didn't realize she had gone until it was too late.

You fall in love with her loyalty. Even faced with the impossible choice of following someone she trusts, and someone else she admires, she sticks with who she's sworn an oath to, and you couldn't be more proud of her. But sometimes that loyalty is tested too much, and if she is more loyal to him than you, then you know where her priorities lie, and they aren't with you.

You fall in love with her friendliness even though you are sometimes jealous of all those other people she likes. The way she makes friends is both awkward and endearing at the same time. As is everything else about her.

You fall in love with her naivety. She thinks the world is always going to be good and bad, black and white. But lately she has changed that opinion, and you can't decide if it's a good change, or a bad one.

You fall in love with her trust and the way she will stay by your side throughout everything. Once you earn her trust, you will have it forever and you can rely on her for anything. But lately she has started to drift away, and he can't really be sure that she will always be there for him because she left once before. What's to say she won't again?

You fall in love with her grace. Or more precisely, her lack of grace. She is awkward when moving and talking and gesturing, and you find it adorable. The way she will go out of her way to make sure you're not being insulted, even though you knew she meant it as a joke. Or the way she will fling her arms around when making a point, and knocks the lamp off of your desk and doesn't stop apologizing for a week. But lately she has gained a sort of confidence she had otherwise lacked when you were growing up together. She seems surer of herself, and moves with agility and beauty that he hasn't seen before. Although you're glad that someone made it out of this mess happy, you can't help but wonder why she changed, and if it had anything to do with you.

You fall in love with all her habits, all her beauty, all her awkwardness, all her adorableness, and everything in between. The person you knew in the academy is your best friend, your partner in crime, your confidante, and your family. But this new person, although beautiful, is different. And you've never liked change, and even less when it's concerning your best friend. You loved the old Jemma, and although you already love this new Jemma, you wish she hadn't changed because of you. You wish she didn't think she was somehow responsible for everything that had happened to the two of you. You wish she hadn't gone and changed everything you loved about her. Maybe she felt inadequate, maybe she felt unwanted, maybe she felt overbearing. And if she did, you hate yourself even more for making her feel that way.

You think it was easy to fall in love with her. And it was. All it took was a single glance to know that she would change your life forever. The hard part was staying in love through the heartbreak and sorrow and change that threatened to tear you apart. But as long as you keep yourself together, maybe you can mend the string that binds your hearts together. Because it's scary how thin that string is getting.

But you will fix it.

Just like you fix everything.

Together.

 **let me know what you think!**


End file.
